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Time to resurrect the Trans thread

Discussion in 'Miscellaneous Discussion' started by Dax, 18 July 2013.

  1. Dax

    Dax The Great and Powerful Daxie

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    When I first came to UKoE, I started a thread about gender and sexuality.

    At the time I thought I was Bi-gender, but it seems in reality the issue I had was not being able to be 'me' and be accepted by society for being a semi-tomboy - or at least being interested in stereotypical male ways of thinking such as in interest in maths and physics, preferring toy cars and model planes to dolls and playing the drums etc. But I know there are others who have been born in the wrong body and are thinking about or making a transition.

    I started the thread to make a safe place for people to go who were nervous about coming out etc.

    As that got locked down a year ago, and a bi-sexual thread is currently in action, I thought I would put this thread here for anyone thinking about changing gender - M2F or F2M.

    Don't feel you have to post, if you are not ready don't do it.
     
    Kizzy, Deadpanda, Wisdom Pen and 4 others like this.
  2. Dylia

    Dylia Jeune Fille Garnement

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    While I don't intend to make any big steps, as of late I've been convinced I'm FTM - I can't stand hanging out with girls because I find most of them brainless (as in, "omg boys, Justin Bieber, he's so hot, X Factor's awesome, etc...), I don't wear make-up, I refuse to wear skirts, I only hangout with boys, and to be honest, I have the body shape and voice (well, deep toned but with a twinge of feminine as people describe it) of a he.

    But the thing is, I'm comfortable with who I am. But I'm not too sure... it's all subject to change. Although, I will say I respect transgenders. I know a few, and the fact they're so, so devoted to being who they want to become and going through all those major steps, lose friends along the way, just to be happy... it's a sign of pure determination.
     
  3. Alfie

    Alfie Banned User

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    Not sure if I'm MTF or just reaaaaally like cross-dressing.
     
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  4. Dax

    Dax The Great and Powerful Daxie

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    Well that's an acceptable thing too... look at Eddie Izzard

    I think a lot of the trouble stems from how society tries to make people fit into just 2 roles. That's where the bi-gender/ no-gender ism fits in. There is also the fact that people don't mind fitting into one role, but they were born in the wrong body.
     
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  5. sleazyrum

    sleazyrum Filthy hater

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    I think the newest Idea Channel video fits the theme of this thead.
     
    FireSparkle likes this.
  6. Thorn

    Thorn Ryuu ga waga teki wo kurau!

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    One of my absolute best friends is an MTF transgender herself. Before I met her (well, more accurately, before she told me about being transgendered), I honestly thought transgenders were very weird and I would never understand. When she told me, I didn't know what to think. But after giving it some thought and after doing a bit more research on the subject, I grew to understand why people wouldn't be entirely comfortable being themselves. And considering how often I was bullied in school for being different, it's something I really should have realised earlier.

    She's getting an operation in October. Fixing the plumbing as her Dad humorously puts it. I've been telling her constantly how proud of her I am for going through with it. It's the only type of non-mandatory plastic surgery I condone.
     
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  7. servirare

    servirare hmmmmm

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    I would not say that's a sign of being transgender at all (you may well be, but this isn't it). Tastes are massively varied, strong enough to overcome the considerable social pressure to like those things in your case. Those things aren't much fun and apart from the implied social pressure, gender has nothing to do with it. Schools tend to be rather closed environments that amplifies that kind of group behaviour (I assume you're still there). I don't think I personally know any women who actually like that stuff. Also, I'm an engineer/scientist and most of the women I know from that part of my life would fit just about all of those categories you've mentioned, as well as in some cases being rather astonishingly macho.

    Since you mentioned voice pitch, a rather fun observation is that people tend to make subtle modifications in their behaviour to more closely match their peer group, including voice pitch. So women in male dominated groups (e.g. physicists) tend to have deeper voices and men in more female dominated groups (e.g. biologists) tend to have higher pitched voices.
     
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  8. FireSparkle

    FireSparkle Code wizard in training

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    Eeep! This thread is full of really awesome people :D
    Hi, I'm Alice! A 17 year old MtF. I like flowers and bunnies. I also like shooting wave after wave of zombies whilst generic rock music plays. Rawr!
    Other than that, here's a picture of me taken at Arlo's meet today. I felt pretty for the first time in a while :)
    [​IMG]
     
  9. Arlo

    Arlo Explosions

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    Hey, Arlo here!
    I'm agender, and have never felt defined by either gender. I can wake up in the morning feeling like a girl, and by lunchtime I just feel like a man in a dress, then by the evening, it's all switched again!
    I've been through a lot with my transgenderism, and it's a part of who I am, I try my best to be a beacon of light for young people who are getting to know themselves as a different gender, I try and help out where I can, as I've known since I was a child I was transgender (just didn't have a word for it for ages), I know what it's like to realise it, to come out, and to get bullied for it. If you ever need a shoulder to lean on, or just someone to talk to, my skype is "Crochetsaurus" , or find me on IRC :)
     
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  10. Cavatina

    Cavatina Made with 101% snuggles!

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    Hi, I'm Katy! 19 year old MtF, lover of music, games, and all things huggable and fluffy~ Been transitioning slowly for the last 2 or 3 years, but only been focusing on it since February this year, due to finally feeling comfortable around people and feelings like I truly have some support and that i'm not going at it alone. Though regardless of that I'm still kinda struggling due to no confidence when it comes to actually presenting myself as I wish to be seen. Something I really want to change.

    I also was the catalyst for Firesparkle, been supporting her to the best of my ability since february~
    Heres the only picture of me i've taken that I've liked in a while. Lately hate for my body has kinda rocketed so I've got nothing more recent than a month ago... hope the feelings I have right now go away soon though, I was relatively fine for a few months but it's getting hard again now.
    [​IMG]
     
    #10 Cavatina, 21 July 2013
    Last edited: 21 July 2013
  11. Dax

    Dax The Great and Powerful Daxie

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    :D I seem to recognise that awesome dress!
     
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  12. Centurion

    Centurion Honorary Pony

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    I was kind of shocked when my best friend at college told me that he wanted to be MtF, but I instantly respected his decision and he told his parents via text message shortly after he told me (let's be honest, it's not exactly the best way to tell someone that), but thankfully they were OK too. I'm not too sure when he's starting the transition yet or even identifying as female. Oh, and did I mention he's a Brony?
     
  13. Tibbs

    Tibbs cats.

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    Figured I might post my thoughts here on the topic; Not being transgendered myself, I can only understand a fraction of what's involved, but such is life. I've been comfortable with my gender and if I ever did have any doubts, they never lasted very long as I can't remember any significant times, however I was brought up solo by my mother, so I'm probably not as masculine as I would've been had my father been in the picture, but that's for another day.
    What I do want to bring up is the side of the fence and perspective of the people who adapt to someone being transgender.

    A key element of it is how involved you are with the person who's transitioning and what your relationship with them is like (acquaintance, friend, close friend, etc.). As you go up, I found that how you go about things changes.
    From personal experience, the more in-depth you are with someone and the closer you are to them, the more you'll find yourself wanting to help them out with transitioning. I think it's great, you're helping someone explore, discover and settle down into the person/gender they feel they are. It does have some drawbacks though. At some point, dysphoria and self loathing will occur, not in yourself, but in the person who's transitioning. It's part of the process as far as I'm aware and can't be avoided, and unfortunately from my position, there's not a lot you can do about it except try to be there for them, and try not to be pulled down yourself, however that can be increasingly difficult if you're quite close to someone.

    As Cavi said earlier, having other people around to support is a big plus, and sticking with them through the process will really help, even if you don't feel you're doing much.

    In the first days, metaphorically speaking, there'll be a period of time adapting to new pronouns and such. It won't be an overnight thing, sadly, but if you try, the person who's transitioning will respect you all that more for it, however this only really works if you're involved as it were - from a more general standpoint, if you're unsure as to which pronouns you should use (and it can be situational as well), just ask them for clarification. FireSparkle will agree with me on this, it's better for a couple of minutes of awkwardness discussing things rather than an elongated period using neutral pronouns (they, them, their, etc.). It also depends, from experience, on how long you knew said person as their previous gender. Obviously if you've known someone as a male for a year or two and they wish to come out as being MtF, then the adaptation period would be significantly longer than someone who you've only known for a couple of weeks.

    In short, it's a difficult slope for both parties due to varying factors, and no two situations will be the same. Both the person who's transitioning and the person who's helping them need to help each other out. It sounds a bit backwards maybe, but in the long run it'll work out for the better, as I'm sure FireSparkle can attest.


    egad, textwall. Cloudane, I may be the 2nd element of textwalls. Also if I managed to offend anyone, I humbly apologise and issue you one free ticket to beat me with whatever implement you choose.
     
  14. Becca

    Becca Gone fishing.

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    I'll probably post something better in here later but I remember finding this TEDx talk to be quite good:
     
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  15. Ripp_

    Ripp_ * You Hug the Pig

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    Knowing trans/a/bi-gender people dose make you question how society and gender fit together a whole lot more.

    I often wonder how much of gender is natural and how much it is artificial hyped by stereotyping
     
    Arlo likes this.
  16. jsqrde

    jsqrde Drinking enthusiast

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    I am... not exactly MtF, it's more like I just identify differently all the time. Some days, I'm a (slightly feminine) guy and others I just wake up and I feel like I identify more as a woman. I don't know really, I just change sometimes.
     
    Starblaze☆ likes this.
  17. FireSparkle

    FireSparkle Code wizard in training

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    A hell of a lot of it is just society pushing stereotypes :oops:
     
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  18. Dylia

    Dylia Jeune Fille Garnement

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    This.

    This is the absolute truth, sister.
     
  19. Ripp_

    Ripp_ * You Hug the Pig

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    Kids shows! Teaching you important morals and that only girls like pink fluffy unicorns dancing on rainbows...
     
  20. Cavatina

    Cavatina Made with 101% snuggles!

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    Yep, it's pretty much entirely the society stereotypes. If we didnt have gender in the sense we do now, things wouldnt be how they are for some of us. Luckily recently gender stereotypes are being severely challenged, and it's slowly becoming easier in general.
     

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